SUGGESTIONS FOR BUILDING ASSETS

Asset # 11- Family Boundaries

(Families set clear rules and consequences, and know where their children are and what they do)

To Build Asset # 11 Parents and Extended Family Can . . .

* Involve kids in deciding what the rules and consequences are. Make sure they are understood by everyone. Follow through with consequences if a rule is broken.

* Meet the parents of your children's friends before allowing your children to visit there. Have a list of phone numbers for all your kids' friends and "hangouts."

* Touch base with them often. Keep a message board.

* Make sure you and your partner have the same rules for your kids and that you support each other in keeping them. If divorced, stay involved in your children's lives when they are not with you. Work with their other parent to have consistent rules. Your kids need to know that they have two loving parents who communicate and care about them.

* Get detailed information about what children are going to do away from the home before you give your permission for them to go. If they don't know all the answers to your questions, they will have to find out before you say yes

* Put up with the chaos that can come from kids in your home, and make it a place that kids like to gather.

* Get advice from other parents, books, or experts if you are having problems with setting or keeping boundaries.

* Don't just give up on them

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43% of youth surveyed by Search Institute have this asset in their lives.*

*Based on Search Institute surveys of almost 100,000 6th to 12th grade youth throughout the United States